


Goodbye, Brother

by Elvarya85



Category: Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
Genre: Gen, references to canon rape and sexual assault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-27
Updated: 2012-06-27
Packaged: 2017-11-08 17:42:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/445788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elvarya85/pseuds/Elvarya85
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The night after the incident with Sohrab and the kite, Amir has a dream, and says his final goodbyes to Hassan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye, Brother

I was able to breathe again for the first time in so long. The smile wasn't much, and Sohrab still wasn't speaking. Who knew how long it would be until he was okay, if ever? But it was a start; it was hope.

That night, I kissed Soraya goodnight and fell asleep easily. The smile was like a blanket of comfort. I wasn't doing everything wrong. I almost didn't want to think it yet, but maybe, just maybe, I was helping the boy. And maybe, helping him was helping me?

I entered a dream, a space of light without much color. The light felt like it was shining down from the heavens. Cleansing. I turned around, taking in the wonderful space, and stopped.

Hassan was there. Not the young boy of my memories, but the tall, strong man I'd seen in the polaroid. A light smile played across his lips and his eyes gleamed as they met mine.

"Hello, agha," he said. His voice was deep and rich, but also kind. In his words, in his tone, I heard everything that was Hassan. Everything I'd known of him, and something else. Love, and forgiveness.

"H-Hassan," was all I could say in response, and then my legs gave out beneath me, spilling me to the ground pitifully. I fell to my knees before him and wept. I wasn't completely aware of it, but there was a constant stream of words coming out of my mouth. The most common words were, "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Brother," Hassan assured me. I looked up to him and blinked back the tears, and he was giving me a knowing smile.

"Yes, I do," I insist. "I-I saw you in that alley. I could have stopped it, I-"

"I know," Hassan replied. His smile faltered slightly, and his brow creased, but it was only for a moment. It cleared away to reveal a face set in determination. "We were boys, and Assef was…well, Assef was Assef. But you have nothing to apologize for, Amir. I can assure you of that." I bowed my head again, too ashamed to meet his gaze. It was a much firmer gaze, much surer, than the one I'd seen. When we were boys, Hassan bent to my every wish and desire. It was what he was supposed to do. But we weren't boys anymore. And Hassan wasn't my servant anymore, or even my friend.

He was my brother. But I'd betrayed him; how could he forgive me so easily?

"I haven't come here to condemn you, Amir," he said. "Please, stand. I don't like talking down to you like this." I closed my eyes for a moment, and then nodded, rising and wiping the tears as I did so. "I've come here to tell you that you are forgiven, Amir agha, totally and completely. A thousand times over, you are forgiven." I closed my eyes again and looked down. How could I possibly deserve this? "But there's something more. I want to thank you."

I looked up sharply at that. "Thank me? For what?"

"You saved him," Hassan said. "Sohrab. You saved him from those monsters." He chuckled a bit. "You finally got to save me from Assef. You aren't that little boy in the alley anymore." He sobered slightly. "I know it wasn't an easy journey, and you went through a lot to get him out of there. You saved my son, Amir, and for that, I am eternally grateful." Tears were fully flowing now. "You know he is still troubled. Please, don't give up on him. He's still the sweet little boy that I knew. He actually reminded me a bit of you, at times." The side of his mouth turned up. "Take care of him, because I cannot. And please, forgive yourself."

I could see him fading now, and I knew that I would wake soon. "Hassan!" I cried. "Don't leave me!"

His voice seemed to echo back across a void, engulfing me, and calming me.

"Goodbye, Bother."

I woke with a start, turned on my side, and began sobbing. I stayed like that until I fell back into a dark, dreamless sleep. The next morning, Soraya saw my puffy eyes, and the tear stains on my pillow, but she didn't ask, simply nodded and left me on my own.

Logically, I knew it was just a dream. But something inside of me knew that it was more. Maybe it was Hassan's spirit coming back, asking something of me for the first time ever. Or maybe not.

Either way, I chose to believe


End file.
